Wheels of Faith (a short story) Ep.1

The Waiting Series

#Episode 1

Wheels of Faith

(a short story)

Come daughter, walk on water

Valery crept under the duvet like a refugee. Her room was in complete disarray. Her heart too. Her room looked like it had been under a siege.

Her drapes hung quiet. Everything was still, except her heart.

When, just when?

Maybe when you’re 32!

She wondered if the last thought was hers. What difference did it make anyway? She was still here, as single as the hot dog in the sausage Mide bought her on their last date. The date had gone well until he went cheap.

“Valery, it’s been what now? Two months, yeah, two months!” He had this mischievous smile on his face.

“Okay…?” She pushed the plate away slightly.

Mide leaned closer, “You are everything I desire. Your beauty melts me so bad.” He helped tuck one of the braids behind her ear and then slowly let the tip of his fingers run through to the small of her back. His touch made an impact. She stuttered trying to speak.

“Urgh…How?” He smiled sheepishly making her feel like a child.

“Maybe I could show you at my place tonight.” His eyes dancing slow and steady over her body.

Mide was definitely good-looking. She couldn’t deny that. The way he starred at her made her curl on the inside, but she knew better now. Had she not ignored the warning signs all along, hoping against hope? She almost could not believe he spilled that tosh. All Mide wanted was her body. He wanted her body more than he cared for her soul.

It was their third date. They had met during a singles’ conference two months back. All along, Mide pulled subtle stunts, acting all nice, caring and friendly. Now, she was sure her body was all he wanted.

Just when she thought she had met the man she’s been praying about. Somehow, I thought this was it, Lord. She took her purse and left the table without a word.

Why are you so unfortunate with men?

The voices wouldn’t stop. She was beginning to see truth in the lies.

Valery reluctantly slid out of the duvet. She kept staring at the vintage clock on the side table. She wanted to reach for it, but then hesitated.

Her gaze still on it, she wondered why her life was so dramatic. God was taking too long. Over and over again, He kept assuring her that He had a man for her.

It wasn’t David. It wasn’t Seye. On and on, the list was long. David got married few months after they broke up. December that same year, she met Seye Madebo at an art exhibition. He showed interest in her work. They got talking. They vibed so well. Their first phone conversation lasted over two hours. He made his intentions clear from the very start. He wanted a future with her. Valery was getting nostalgic with all the memories.

Even now, she couldn’t help but smile, reminiscing about their several night calls. She still could not deny how much she liked him and would have said “yes” over and over again, but his parents were firmly against his choice. The Lord had told her to let go, and wait for him. It was a ruined-joy experience for her at the time. Seye loved the Lord, and he ticked so many boxes. Reliving those moments made her feel sick all of a sudden. It was such a bittersweet experience. Sometimes she wondered if she was in anyway the source of her own predicament. At least for now, that’s how best she could describe it. Valery knew God had plans for her, only that sometimes it was really hard to swallow the pill.

I’m tired, Lord.

She dug her head into the pillow, tired of hearing her phone ring for the umpteenth time.

And again, it rang. Valery stretched out her hand to pick it from the side table, incidentally tipping off the clock. The sound of the clock hitting the tiled floor made her head hurt, the last time she ate cooked food was two days back, a leftover jollof from the freezer.

Moaning softly, she managed, "Hi Jola, I'm good…" Her voice was flat enough to help Jola know she was the exact opposite.

"Babes, you don't sound too good. What's up?"

"I said I'm fine!" She adjusted her body slightly on the bed.

“I’m sorry I yelled. I just need some time alone.” Valery had repeated that to everyone who seemed to be a bother to her over the last one month. Her mom, her siblings, her manager. Jola, her best girl wasn’t an exception.

She just wanted to end the call. She was already dreading Jola asking how she hoped to spend her birthday. It was two days to Valery’s birthday, and she was determined to maintain this mode till after her birthday. That way she would escape the expected questions and prayers in form of a reminder. She was grateful it was a Monday. A busy work day for everyone.

“You really need to move on…”

Valery could tell that Jola was getting worried about her.

"Val, sometimes, our paths get rocky and dark, and all we need is light to see that we are still being held.” Jola took a deep breath and continued.

“You are hurting yourself more than you know!” She managed to say it slowly, but firm enough. She was grateful Jola at least did not mention the birthday topic.

“I’m just really tired, Jola. Too tired to see the light you’re talking about.” She sounded a little angrier than just tired.

Jola closed her eyes, “And that’s fine, Val. But don’t remain there. Jeremiah 29 vs 11 says, For I know the thoughts that I think towards you says the Lord. Thoughts of peace, and not of evil. To give you an ex..."

Valery gave a bleak laugh, "expected end!" She had heard that too many times. Now, all she wanted was to see the verse come alive. It’s been just a memory verse for too long. She wanted to touch it and experience it. She found herself crying again. “I’ll talk to you later. Thanks for calling.” She ended the call before Jola could say another word.

They don’t get it, do they? I love God! I had faith! But I’m still here… Still here!

And I never left.

She pushed the phone away from her reach. She did not want any more calls. She snail-paced herself to the edge of the bed, bending to see if her little clock got broken. She picked it up and placed it back in position.

The words kept echoing in her head, “And I never left.” She whispered, "Lord, just if You can still hear me, I need You now!" She could feel the tension in her throat as she whispered.

Hold your peace, daughter. I am right here. I am never late.

Valery wondered if she had just imagined that or if she actually did hear it. She looked all around her.

Everywhere was fairly dark, even though it was only some minutes past 6pm. Her purple drapes hung quiet. For days now, she wouldn’t raise the drapes or switch on the lights. She rolled over to the other end of the bed and stared at nothing in particular.

This Saturday was different. Usually she’d write about the events of the week, the things she was grateful for, and then chart a plan for the following week. Today she wasn’t sure about this new week.

She got up from the bed and tried to stretch. Her body ached so bad. Dragging her feet, she managed to get to the bathroom for a shower. It was a long shower. Only if she could wash away the anxiety and tiredness she greatly felt in her soul.

They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength.

The whisper was in her heart, but it was loud. It felt like someone actually did whisper into her ears.

Still in her white Turkish bathrobe, she paced herself towards one of the casement windows in the room, squinting her eyes as she slowly raised the drapes. She wasn’t ready for the sunray that hit her, but she loved every bit of it.

Sunset was definitely beautiful today, as always. She always enjoyed how it flooded her canvas whilst working.

What!

It’s been one whole week since she last held a paintbrush.

She closed her eyes and stood still, taking it all in.

Jola was right. I’ve waded in gloomy waters for too long. Help me, Abba.

“I believe You. Help my unbelief.” Her voice was low and gentle.

She rested her back on the window pane. Her room was a mess. She couldn’t agree more. Sunrays beautifully filled the room, but it exposed her disarrayed room, pile of dirty clothes, cans of her favourite carbonated drink littered the tiled floor. She had lost count. That and junk food from the refrigerator had been her survival kit since Thursday. She placed her right hand on her hip, wondering where to begin cleaning. She had to start someway. How did she even get here? She picked a short sleeveless army green dress and managed some Everton almond oil on her scalp. Her locs were still sitting pretty and clean. She had stopped over at the saloon last Saturday for a retouch. She arrived her apartment weary that evening. She was tired in her soul. She drowned in the sea blue loveseat in the small cozy living room. She could feel resentment swelling up on her inside.

He has failed you. Hasn’t He? A man is a man. Why the stress? She recognized the voice.

But she too tired to contest. Maybe the voice was right to an extent. God had told her she’d be married before the end of the year. When Mide came around, she thought that was the answer. Turned out he was plastic.

Even though she knew firmly that the Lord spoke to her, she was unsure how the promise would still be kept. It was only few months to Christmas, December! And the year would be over and gone again. Just like the others.

**

Valery tried repacking her dreads in a different style. Her phone rang again. This time she picked before checking who the caller was. It wasn’t a saved number.

“Hello…”

“Hi Valery. I saw a couple of your art work on bid at Twains store yesterday. Loved every piece. Brilliant!” She could almost see his grin from his voice.

“Oh, ok...” She sounded unsure.

“I mean great! Thank you…” His excitement was definitely contagious. But he called at the wrong time. She wasn’t up for this much excitement. Not today, and she wasn’t even sure when.

[ To be continued…]